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What should I know about sleep and toddlers and preschoolers?
Toddlers: Children 1-2 years of age should have 11-14 hours of sleep over a 24-hour period. This may be split up between nighttime sleeping and a nap or two during the daytime. It may take several weeks of experimenting before you discover what works best for your toddler.
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Preschoolers: Sleep helps your kids grow strong and healthy during their preschool years (ages 3 to 5). Most children during this age need between 10 and 13 hours of sleep over a 24-hour period and usually one daytime nap. Older children may not need any naps at all.
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How do sleep needs change during the toddler and preschool years?
Toddlers: By the end of the second year, naps typically decrease to once a day lasting up to three hours. Most toddlers move from cribs to beds between the ages of 2 and 3. Toddlers often do not look forward to bedtime. They do not want to be separated from the parent/guardian or miss out on any of the fun activities they feel might be going on. Common sleep problems at this age include bedtime resistance, night awakening(s) and difficulty returning to sleep. Other problems can include nighttime fears and nightmares.
Preschoolers: Napping begins to trail off, although most preschoolers can still benefit from taking a nap. The best way to do this is to establish a set routine time for napping or simply quiet or relaxing time in the child’s bedroom. Even if your child can't sleep, try to set aside some 'quiet time' in the early afternoon for your child to relax. Around an hour a day is a sufficient amount of time. Sleep problems are common during these preschool years. These problems can include resisting going to sleep and waking frequently at night. Also common during the preschool years are nighttime fears, nightmares, sleepwalking and sleep terrors.
How can I help my toddler or preschooler sleep well?
You can do a number of things to establish an excellent bedtime routine to ensure that your toddler gets enough sleep. When setting up a bedtime routine, keep these things in mind:
- Stick to the same set bed times and wake up times each day. Don't short change nap time either – make sure that it does not occur too late in the day or that it is too brief – either of these will result in lack of a good night's sleep.
- Maintain a consistent bedtime routine. Turn off overhead lights and use dim table lamps starting 30-60 minutes before bedtime to minimize light exposure. Establish calm and enjoyable activities in the 30 minutes right before bedtime, such as taking a bath or reading bedtime stories to help your child wind down. It is helpful to set clear limits as to how many books you will read or songs you will sing. Allow your child to pick out which pajamas he or she wishes to wear and which stuffed animal to take to bed, etc. This choice of security object (stuffed animal or blanket) helps your child feel more relaxed at bedtime and all through the night.
- Make sure the bedroom environment is quiet, cool, dark and comfortable for sleeping. A nightlight or area light on the very lowest dimmer setting is fine. Playing soft, soothing music or sound machine is fine. Remember to reserve the bed for sleeping only – it should not be used as a platform for playing. Television watching in the bedroom should not be allowed. Any other form of screen time (iPad, smart phones, etc.) should not be part of the bedroom environment. These can over-stimulate the child and make it harder for them to fall asleep.
- Limit food and drink (especially any drinks containing caffeine) before bedtime. Remember, many clear beverages contain caffeine, so check the label. A light snack before bedtime is OK.
- Tuck your child into bed in a sleepy but awake state, then leave the room. This will help your child learn to fall asleep on his or her own and help your child return to sleep independently if he or she wakes up in the middle of the night.
- Preschoolers: If a preschooler has a bothersome night waking or nightmare, it is okay for him or her to call out or seek out Mom or Dad for comfort. However, once calmed down, Mom or Dad should return the child to his or her own bed. Surround the child with items of comfort, such as a favorite stuffed animal or soft blanket or other object that will allow the child to fall asleep again independently without the need to leave the bed and seek you out again.
Safety issues with toddlers
Toddlers are at an age where they are becoming increasingly aware and curious about their surroundings. Therefore, as the parents or guardians, you will need to be more cautious about your child's crib, what is placed in it and its surroundings. For instance:
- Don’t leave extra-large stuffed toys in the crib or leave on the bumper pads – your toddler can use these objects as a step to climb over the crib rail.
- Look for and remove objects with strings or ties that could accidentally end up wound around your child's neck, such as cords on blinds or curtains.
- Look at any objects that might be too close to your child's crib and that your child might be able to reach from a standing position – such as wall hangings, curtains, window blinds and dresser doilies.
- If you have such an active toddler, for safety reasons it might be time to move him or her from a crib to a toddler bed.
- Consider anchoring large furniture to the walls to prevent them from falling over if your child tries to climb on them.
When should I seek a doctor's help regarding sleep issues with my toddler or preschooler?
Contact a doctor if:
- Your child seems to have trouble breathing, snores or makes noise when breathing, or you have seen your child stop breathing while sleeping.
- Your child has unusual nighttime behaviors, unexpected number of awakenings or has significant nighttime fears that you are concerned about.
- Your feel your child's sleep problems are affecting daytime behavior.
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Mornings for some of you begin as early as 4 AM. Waking up too early can mean a tired family and earlier naps, throwing off bedtime rituals later. Waking up too late does the opposite, pushing nap time to later in the day and sometimes prolonging bedtime. And believe it or not, a later bedtime doesn’t mean your child will wake later. Don’t worry! Early rising in toddlers is a very common problem that can be fixed!
The four main causes of early rising toddlers are:
- Bedtime is too late
- Nap deprivation
- Staying up too long between the end of his afternoon nap and going to bed — try not to let the interval exceed four hours
- Going to bed when he’s past that “drowsy but awake” mark. If he’s too drowsy, he won’t know how to get himself back to sleep when he’s more alert — including at 5:00a.m.
Important Points About Early Rising in Toddlers
Toddlers who wake up cheerful at 6:00 or 6:30 are just “morning people.” But kids who are a total grump by 7:00, are a different story.
You need to intervene and coach him to sleep later. The longer you endure early risings, the harder it is to change the pattern. Better you address it now, even if it takes a few weeks to see results. Once they’re older, it can take months.
Make sure your early rising toddler is getting enough daytime sleep — nap deprivation can cause poor night sleep and early awakenings. Younger toddlers (12 to 18 months) generally take two daytime naps, while older toddlers take one afternoon nap.
What schedule is YOUR toddler on?
Read: Baby and Child Sleep: Sample Schedules From 6 Months to Preschool
Fix Early Rising in Toddlers with…Curtains?
If too much light is coming into the toddler’s room, buy room-darkening blinds. Sometimes the simplest solution for early rising in toddlers IS the solution. These are also good for napping.
If an external noise like garbage trucks, songbirds, or a dad with a long commute who has turned on the shower is waking him, you might want to try a white noise machine or a fan.
Respond Immediately to Early Rising
When your early bird stirs, go to his room immediately.
You want to try to get him back to sleep ASAP, not let him scream himself awake. Give him his lovey and try to soothe him back to sleep without picking him up.
Even if he doesn’t doze off again — and not all toddlers will at first — do not turn on the lights or get him out of his crib until 6:00 a.m. no matter how much he protests. Getting him up earlier, while it is still dark, sends a confusing message and is another example of intermittent reinforcement.
He can’t understand why he can get up in the dark at 5:45 a.m. but not at 2:15 a.m. Also, many parents have learned the hard way that if they let him get up at 5:45 a.m., the next thing they know it’s 5:30, 5:15, etc.
Does your toddler have a lovey?
Read: The Lovey — Your Child’s First Best Friend
Stay in Your Child’s Room
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At this age, I usually recommend that the parent stay in the room for this early-morning routine.
If, however, you feel your presence is encouraging him to be more awake, as often occurs with older children, you can try leaving his room after a bit of reassurance and see if he falls asleep again on his own.
Check on him every ten to fifteen minutes.
If you stay in the room, keep the interaction minimal. Try sitting in a chair with your eyes closed. When the clock finally strikes 6:00 a.m. and he’s not falling asleep, leave the room for a minute or two.
He may cry, but try not to let it bother you — you will be right back in a minute.
Sick of waking up before the sun?
There are 5 causes and 5 ways to combat early rising in children - find out how in our Gentle Sleep Solutions e-Course, available now!
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When you come back in, make a big deal out of “good morning” time. Do your dramatic wake-up.
The morning routine is the flip side of the bedtime-routine coin. Your goal is to help him distinguish between day and night, to know when it really is time to get up.
Your message must be clear: “I’m getting you out of the crib because it’s morning time, not because you were crying.”
Treat Early Rising Like Night Wakings
If your early riser is over 2 or 2.5 years old and sleeps in a bed, then you will have to return your child to their bed and treat this like a night wakening.
Continue with your Shuffle position until the clock strikes 6:00 a.m. Consider using an alarm clock radio or a light with an appliance timer to help signal to your child when it is wake up time.
If you sometimes let your child get out of bed and start the day before the music comes on then he or she will not take the alarm clock seriously!
Forgot how to do The Shuffle?
Read: The Sleep Lady Shuffle: How to Gently Sleep Train your Baby
More Tips for Early Rising in Toddlers
- Skipping naps and putting your child to bed later will cause early rising. It seems counterintuitive, but it is true!
- You can’t assume your child needs less sleep than the average until they are taking decent naps and sleeping through the night for several weeks.
- Room darkening shades are critical!
- Early rising takes several weeks of utter consistency to change so stick with it!
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If your child is new to early rising since daylight saving time ended, use the nap to get to the new bedtime. In other words make sure the nap is after 12 p.m., and is long enough so that the wakeful window after the nap is not longer than 4 hours (max 5 for a toddler/preschooler who is well rested).
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Patience, consistency, and understanding of both your child and his needs are critical for this process to be successful. Be firm and be loving and good mornings will be right around the corner! I wish you both many happy mornings together!